Title Without Character

WHO we are is a powerful statement. How we act, think and feel speak of who we are as a people. They narrate our character.

In life we are on our individual journeys of BECOMING who we are as people. Whether this be spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally, in our careers and jobs, tastes of music, education, etc, we are in a process. Our characters are forming.

We can become in danger of wanting things but not developing the character that will allow us to sustain that which we want. Simba from The Lion King is a great example of this.

Simba was the son of King Mufasa, and was the next rightful heir to the throne.  He was very sure of himself knowing that he was born into royalty, he knew who his father was, and he knew that one day he would be king and rule over the other lions and the lands.

At this point in time Simba was only a child, maturity had not yet kindled itself within him. He acted how he thought.

Simba had what we would call in today’s society, an under-developed character. Due to what he knew, he thought that his present tense character was enough to sustain him as king.

Even though he was destined to be king, he had not yet formed the character necessary to be a good king. He wanted the title but didn’t have the character.

A title is something descriptive or distinctive that belongs to someone. Simba’s title was king, but for us it could be marriage, business, a relationship, car, house, job/ new job, head of a department, career, education, money, etc.

When we put character to title within this context, it changes everything.

Definition of character: The aggregate of features and traits that form the individual nature of some person or thing.

Simba was always destined to be king, that was never going to change. However, he had to go through a process to develop his character.

He had to change his mind so that his true character could be formed. We have to move from a knowing, into being.

The rest of the film shows how Simba’s character changed before he finally became the king he was meant to be.

If he did not go through the necessary process then he never would of developed the character that allowed him to be a good king.

We, as a people, are no different to Simba. No matter who we are or what we do, we MUST develop good character. We must go through training that will shape our characters, so that no matter where we are WE KNOW WHO WE ARE.

We must always be developing our characters. These traits and features we have will then sustain us in what we do. Our values, standards, attitude, and vision cannot be tinted because our character has been forged in the fire.

Character development cannot be cheated. Your external will always show your internal. If good character is not there then it will eventually show.

Having a title or being given a title, in the context stated earlier,  and developing good character alongside it is fine. The problem is being given or wanting titles and not developing good character.

Do not cheat yourself out of the character process. When you go through things, see the process of character through it.

There is no use in having a great future if your character does not match it.

Do not forfeit your character or take on a title with a premature character. We must check ourselves, our characters to see what we are being made of. Development is key.

A Written Wilderness

Writing is my inner design. I make words dance on paper with my pen. Their structures form like an unborn child taking shape in the womb. I scribe the letters of the soul and resurrect a story’s voice. Ink just flows from me, it runs through my veins as it knows every part of my vessel.

I can write all day. Emotions become transparent water, the hearts thoughts and motives unveil their true value and the adventure of life begins to unfold before the eyes of the very one reading the script. Writing is not just words, it is HEART.

I write simply because I want to write, it is natural to me. I open the textbook of my heart and flick through the spectacles of its dynamic pages. I am like a kid in a candy store, there is so much to see and choose from but you cannot have everything because it will make you sick. Writing is the same for me. I have floods of ideas that run into an ocean as wide as the Pacific but filtering them down stream is a much more mammoth task.

The world of writing is new to me. Reaching into unknown territory through layering research that some of the world of journalism has not exposed to me has been quite eye consuming. I did not know that there was so much involved. Looking at different types and styles of writing, familiarising myself with writing legends and jobs within writing has been mind trafficking, and that is not covering everything. The realisation of truth when crossing the borders of part of an unfamiliar land can be quite scary but rewarding once momentum has kicked in and the race has begun.

I am concluding that no matter the quantity of your head knowledge or having another tell you of your true potential, it is up to you to tap into your internal nature. As I said in my opening sentence ” writing is my inner design”, I still have to get to grips with the DNA of my writing. I believe and know that God has gifted me with writing but unlocking its totality is my written wilderness.

Wilderness can be denoted as a negative term. We associate it with dry, hot, over-exposed, unbearable and endless pain but we forget that the most important part of any wilderness is the JOURNEY. If we equate wilderness to the realms of a person finding themselves or digging deeper to pull something out of them that is hidden, then wilderness can take on a whole new meaning. We forget that we can still LIVE if we know how.

When I refer to a ‘written wilderness’ I am speaking of the wild, uncultivated writer within me that is yet to take on its full form. This is the part of myself with a gifting that needs to be worked on. You do not just form a new habit in two days, it takes one month to generate as part of a renewal process. It takes time.

 

My point is that I have a journalistic background which helps give me some foundations within writing but my written wilderness will be one of my biggest adventures of unmasking for myself. To live daily, unlocking my writing and where it will take me will be one of the hardest but greatest testimony’s of all time. Bettering my English, expanding my reading catalogue, learning and teaching this to others and many other duties are just a few stepping stones in an estuary. This is one of the greatest times of my life.

Help, advice, tips and wisdom are ALWAYS welcome. I write with the aim of bringing change to people’s lives by giving them a eye check-up through my writing. I must now look into doing this for myself internally,  riding the waves of my own mind. Let the path of excitement unroll.

What Is LIVING In Your Head?

Your mind is a vast specimen and an approved force to be reckoned with however in an unwholesome stage it can be your worst nightmare. Take a few minutes to watch the below clip from the series Criminal Minds (season 10 episode 11– The Forever People).

The above clip is solely my driven purpose for this blog post as I am not here to talk about this episode in its entirety.

Jennifer Jareau, known as JJ suffered traumatic and unforeseen abuse at the hands of her ex- overseas colleague, Tivon Askari, whilst working a case. JJ again became a victim of those which her and the team imprison. She suffered not only mental but also physical torture which triggered the loss of her unborn child; forever leaving her scarred.

After the death of Tivon, one year later she is forced to face the anniversary of the event. Every thought and emotion made its presence known and began to manifest like water given to plants. Just like the rest of humanity JJ is no exception to the constant battle of the mind. Even after one year JJ was under the assumption that she had dealt with the situation, which to us in our terms means “I thought I was over it?”.

For one whole year JJ functioned in her ability as a mum, wife and BAU agent. Mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually she had dealt with very little concerning what had happened. We know this as the above clip speaks of JJ’s unconscious mind.

JJ’s dialogue makes for interesting discussion. Her behaviour started speaking which showed a change in her character. Something has shifted in JJ. Her speech, confidence and actions exhibited her non-verbal dialogue. The real conversation was between JJ and her unconscious mind, that which was internally speaking to her.

Tivon Askari

Your unconscious mind is very much alive. We go through different situations and circumstances of which we most times have no control over. The deciding factor of rising above or sinking beneath are the decisions we internally make which determine our actions. The only problem is that we forget to CHECK our unconscious mind.

By definition alone the word unconscious means without awareness, cognition or sensation. The processes in the mind that take place automatically and not given a reflection period. Our thought processes, memories, motivations, etc. The unconscious and its processes exist under the surface and impact our behaviour. Academic research studies have suggested that the unconscious includes repressed feelings, automatic skills, subliminal perceptions, thoughts, habits, automatic reactions and possibly hidden phobias and desires. Some processes expressed in dreams, slips of the tongue and jokes.

Dealing with that which is under the surface is a very important part of growing as a person. When a part of you is revealed and this is enlightened unto you, you have a responsibility and an accountability to do something about it. However as the unconscious deals with under the surface, it HAS to be revealed. Sometimes people are used to show us what we are really made of then at other times we can see our own reflections based upon how we respond to that which happens to us. Yes there is always help but we also have a part to play. JJ’s response was to function at home and work but what she really needed to do was face the monster in her unconscious mind.

Dr Reid addressing JJ’s behaviour

Rather than looking under our skin we can sometimes become efficient. Using what we have in order to just pass by in life rather than sacrificing ourselves to the fullest in order to be all we can be. We hide in the functioning of everyday life when in reality we are unaware of the damage we are doing to ourselves because we are not dealing with what we are really thinking, feeling and going through which is internally taking its toll. Regardless of how much we divorce ourselves from reality we  will never deal with what is under our surface until we face it for ourselves. We all have our own individual ways of dealing with things but what is really living in our minds? What is your unconscious mind saying to you?

The mental processing taking place in our mind is what needs to be daily re-evaluated and challenged. Whether this be our religious belief systems, our dealings with people, how we talk or act towards ourselves and others, our values, our jobs, our personal confidence and self esteem, our relationships with our neighbours, family and friends; the list goes on. We really need to check all our repressed feelings, automatic skills, subliminal perceptions, thoughts, habits, automatic reactions, hidden phobias and desires. We need to see what is going on inside of us. Even the Bible tells us to examine ourselves (1Corinthians 11:28) and look at yourself to change you before being quick to judge others (Matthew 7:5).

My proposal to you today and even unto myself is for us conduct an individual check-up on ourselves; our hearts, feelings and MIND. Yes there is more to our minds than the unconscious but we need to see what is living in it as it is that which has the potential to make or break us. Whether you turn to people for wise counsel or prayer, something needs to be done with the living elements in our minds. Do not be ignorant, deceived or not willing to deal with yourself.

Let’s find and take this journey. There will be times when we really do not like, want to see or even believe what is really underneath but I can assure you that taking and sticking with the best process is a lifetime commitment and will be beneficial. We are merely responding to what can be a great time of change and transformation.

 

 

Internally Shutter-boxed

Man can sometimes mirror machine. Not only has he the ability to function all day and night; sub-sectioning a vast intake whilst constantly re-charging but he also has the capacity to ‘break down’. Human nature has a way of dismissing that which it does not wish to face. Anything that causes internal conflict or outer uncomfortability can cause us to run like prey as if it were conscious of its predator.

Our life is the arena and we are the centre stage of it. All activity concerning us is present in the centre whilst spectators have their active or passive input. Our mind, will and emotions (soul), heart, spirit and physical being are all part of this centre which is affected by the activities of everyday life.

Situations and circumstances (activities of life) trailed alongside their outcomes form us as a people. Their affects shape and help build us into the people who we become and are today. These outcomes can have vibrant or fatal affects on us. We manifest the outcomes our situations and circumstances internally have on us. How we handle the outcomes begin to flow from us. They manifest behaviours and attitudes.

Our arenas; education, religion, work, economy and finance, politics, relationships- love/ family/ friends, culture and other avenues become infected . The exterior gives insight into the interior. How we handle decisions and choices, confusion, beliefs and doubts, unmet desires, frustrations and anger, discouragement, violence and abuse, etc is key to our internal selves.

At any given time or age these impacts on our heart, soul and physical selves still make us prone to the ability to shut ‘ones-self’ down. Today’s society is no better than the ancestors that have lived  before us and those yet to be birthed in a distant future. Even Adam and Eve hid once they had disobeyed God’s instructions (Genesis 3). Life and its hand dealings still have their impact on us.

The problem occurs when we internalise the problems by not handling them well or maybe not at all. We section off the parts we do not want to face. They become little stacker boxes or locked up crates with keys that can only be found in a treasure hunt. Some shut whilst others open. Internally we can hide in every corner or dark valley available to us that allows us to find shade rather than the light we need. We become masters of masquerading rather than transparent beings.

When we begin to shut down internally rather than be honest and face our Goliath’s (giants or mountains) we have a major problem. Not only will we become distant from our real selves but we begin to die inside.

Proverbs 23:7 “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: Eat and drink, saith he to thee; but his heart is not with thee” (King James Version).

Regardless of religion or culture the above scriptural principle applies. Whatever you think you are, you become. The only way of outgrowing what we become is in changing our thoughts and emotions through our decisions from the impacts of life. We become better or worse people based on the internal attitude and what we have been told of who we are and who we internally choose to be, leading to our external manifested self.

Life is different for every person, some worse than others but all still damaging in a way to that particular individual, which I think we all can agree on. The best advice is that regardless of what has happened, seek help. Whether it be through religion or counsel; never internally shut down or get addicted to something that will numb the pain of an internal bleed. Do not internally box yourself up into compartments and write on them the wounds of what happened. Dealing with every box is beneficial, hard but beneficial to you being ALIVE internally.

We think that because everything looks ok on the outside that all is fine but if the inside of a man is not living then he is walking dead.

Proverbs 4:23 reading from the New Living Translation version of the Bible reads “Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life”.

Your heart is central to who you are. When you stop living from it you begin to feel its affects. Life throws some wicked curve balls at us but we can choose to face them and their percussions or internally shutter box; functioning with the lights off. Find a way to not shut down internally but face who you are becoming or have become internally.

 

 

It Costs To Be Me

‘Being Yourself’ has to be one of the biggest challenges that people face in their lives. The ability to be ourselves from the innocent in age to the fully formed adult the world has come to know. It seems like a never ending conquering wall in which we must climb until we reach the top and shout ‘victory’. Our world, its cultures and societal structures consist of visual imagery and sweet rhetoric forcibly fed to us reinforcing an identity of who we really are.

In growing up we become the lab rat for some weird experiment. A symphony for advertisers in which we sometimes fall in tune with and dance to due to the richness of their beauty. After years of becoming accustomed, captivated and sometimes mind numbingly unchallenging, we too can believe that which has been presented to us is who we really are. Just as if the mirror off the wall were walking hand in hand with us as best friends rather than reflecting our true self. Before you know it it is not until you peel back the layers that what we see underneath can be really quite different.

Physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually we are on a journey and this journey is called life. Whether good or bad, life forms and shapes us into who we are today. Health, beauty, education, religion, relationships are just some of these branches which grow from us and form the fruit of their impact on us. Your choices play a big role in this shaping. Situations, circumstances and how we react to them emphasise who we become. Spiderman is a great, even though fictional, character that correlates with this blog post in its intended context. He clearly expresses that it costs to be yourself, your true self. This is very evident in the Spider-Man 2 movie.

Peter Parker was your average typical guy who was raptured in science. His benevolent relationship with his aunt May and Uncle Ben, perplexed relationship with Mary Jane, roller coaster friendship with Harry, scurrilous working relationship with his horrid boss Mr Jameson, unpopular lonely exterior were yet again some of Peter’s branches of life. After his spider bite and transformation into the infamous Spiderman, his life changed including all his branches.

SpiderMan 2

In living and trying to balance two separate lives an internal battle was created. The life of Peter Parker was both drastically and involuntarily changing in order to become Spiderman. All of the branches as spoken about above aided this internal war between Peter Parker and Spiderman. Peter could no longer hold fashion to the demands of Spiderman.  You can not be two people otherwise they will soon collide. Spiderman had a very different branch, he required the soul (mind, will and emotions) of Peter in order to defeat evil and save both the city and people therein. Peter’s soul and therefore his identity were in turmoil and at war on the battlefield. You can not be two people otherwise they will soon collide and one will win; which one is your choice.

SpiderMan 2 shows a season where SpiderMan loses his powers and Peter can once again live. His personal life had become a broken jigsaw puzzle and Peter’s soul was wavering. The heart and desires of Peter were enmity against the requirements of SpiderMan. He makes decisions based on what he wants rather than on that which he was newly becoming as SpiderMan. Some of those decisions prove fatal because it was going to cost Peter something; himself and sometimes we are not ready to count the cost of giving up ourselves.

Downward spiral in powers

SpiderMan is no more

To summarise throughout the rest of the film Peter has to make a choice; to live as he used to with a quiet, lonely and uninterrupted life or be the hero he has become because of change in his life. If you have seen the SpiderMan movies or read the comics then you’ll know he chose SpiderMan… but it cost him. I am not saying that he can not or will never be Peter Parker because that is not true but it costs him some of his branches in order to become who is really is.

To be your true self it will cost you something. This could be relationships, friendships, values and morals, jobs, health, beauty, religion, education, wrong thinking patterns, ritualistic behaviour; anything. The branches in our lives can sometimes have damaging effects but who you really are is what the world needs, not a form of you but a true identity. We all go through stages on experimenting and transitioning but if we become the person who we really are we must weigh up our branches and accept the reality that it will require all of us to be ourself.

God Is A lot Like Forrest Gump

This is not really a blog post per say like my others but really just a thought for the day. This thought came to my mind suddenly and I wish to share it with you. Before everyone starts wondering where I am going with comparing God to Forrest Gump just give me a moment and let me show you what I mean.

This film is about a good hearted but slow man, Forrest Gump, who sits on a bench and shares his life story in which he has seemed to have embarked upon, being personally involved with most major events in history during the last half of the 20th Century.

Revelations 3:20

Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me. (English Standard Version)

The above scripture simply implies that God is waiting to come into a persons life, he is waiting for them to open up their heart and life to him so he can come in and be with that person. The seat next to Forrest Gump was always empty and once filled he shared his life with them, a lot like God does when he is invited into someone’s life. When we meet with God it is like no other encounter or communication that we have ever had or experienced before. He graciously shares all with us. Everything about himself, his Word (the Bible) and life itself. We become enlightened and gain understanding of things that we never knew before, we start life again as if we have just taken our first breath of life again.

God is a lot like Forrest Gump because he is always there, waiting for us; he never leaves. God is not mentally or physically like Forrest Gump and does not have the exact same stories but their characteristics are the same. Forrest Gump never leaves the bench until his story is finished, he keeps speaking regardless of who is sitting on the bench. God is the same; waiting for us to come to him so he can share his story with us and ours with him, no matter who we are (Acts 10:34-35). He wants to share every little detail and build an intimate eternal relationship with us individually.

Psalm 91: 14-16

Because he loves me,” says the Lord, “I will rescue him. I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. He will call on me, and I will answer him. I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honour him. With long life I will satisfy him and show him my salvation.

John 3:16

For this is how God loved the world: He gave his unique Son so that everyone who believes in him might not be lost but have eternal life. (International Standard Version).

It is great to hear others testimonies and personal experiences with God. It is great to hear people tell you about Jesus and what he did for all humanity (died on the cross to take away all the sins- wrong doings- of humanity and resurrected on the third day. Allowing man to return back to God by relationship through Jesus). God clearly loves us and always has regardless of what we have done, do and will do. We can not just hear about God from others, we must know him for ourselves. We must have our own personal revelation of what he did for us and who he is to us. The best part of this is that he wants to share himself with us. He wants to tell us about himself, he wants to tell us his story.

Man (universal context) disappoints and lets each other down. God is the opposite, he is always there because that is who he is, it is his nature; character.

Joshua 1:5

There shall not any man be able to stand before thee all the days of thy life: as I was with Moses, so I will be with thee: I will not fail thee, nor forsake thee. (King James Version)

Sometimes we all need to be reminded that God is not like man and that he never leaves us. Our situations and the world around us may make us feel like God is nowhere to be seen but just like Forrest Gump never stops sharing his story, neither does God; his arms are wide open.

Luke 15:11-32

Then he said, there was once a man who had two sons. The younger said to his father, ‘Father, I want right now what’s coming to me.’So the father divided the property between them. It wasn’t long before the younger son packed his bags and left for a distant country. There, undisciplined and dissipated, he wasted everything he had. After he had gone through all his money, there was a bad famine all through that country and he began to hurt. He signed on with a citizen there who assigned him to his fields to slop the pigs. He was so hungry he would have eaten the corncobs in the pig slop, but no one would give him any. That brought him to his senses. He said, ‘All those farmhands working for my father sit down to three meals a day, and here I am starving to death. I’m going back to my father. I’ll say to him, Father, I’ve sinned against God, I’ve sinned before you; I don’t deserve to be called your son. Take me on as a hired hand.’ He got right up and went home to his father. When he was still a long way off, his father saw him. His heart pounding, he ran out, embraced him, and kissed him. The son started his speech: ‘Father, I’ve sinned against God, I’ve sinned before you; I don’t deserve to be called your son ever again. But the father wasn’t listening. He was calling to the servants, ‘Quick. Bring a clean set of clothes and dress him. Put the family ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Then get a grain-fed heifer and roast it. We’re going to feast! We’re going to have a wonderful time! My son is here—given up for dead and now alive! Given up for lost and now found!’ And they began to have a wonderful time. All this time his older son was out in the field. When the day’s work was done he came in. As he approached the house, he heard the music and dancing. Calling over one of the houseboys, he asked what was going on. He told him, ‘Your brother came home. Your father has ordered a feast—barbecued beef!—because he has him home safe and sound. The older brother stalked off in an angry sulk and refused to join in. His father came out and tried to talk to him, but he wouldn’t listen. The son said, ‘Look how many years I’ve stayed here serving you, never giving you one moment of grief, but have you ever thrown a party for me and my friends? Then this son of yours who has thrown away your money on whores shows up and you go all out with a feast!. His father said, ‘Son, you don’t understand. You’re with me all the time, and everything that is mine is yours—but this is a wonderful time, and we had to celebrate. This brother of yours was dead, and he’s alive! He was lost, and he’s found!. (The Message Version).

Be encouraged and regardless of whether you know God or not that he is there, you just have to reach out or as in Forrest Gump; just sit on the bench and there he will be waiting for you and ready to share his story with you through his son Jesus.