Don’t Frustrate Another Man’s Grace

Grace is defined as ‘the freely given, unmerited favour and love of God’. Another definition coined by Pastor James for grace whilst I attended FGC-UK 2015 was “a steady current of God’s power. Undeserved, unearned and unmerited.”

Grace has two faces; forgiveness and correction. We tend to consume ourselves in reverence and awe of God’s unlimited forgiveness and eternal mercies through his love for us. We say confess, repent (turn from) your old ways and God will forgive you, which he will (1 John 1:9).

However we tend to forget that our actions have consequences. Yes Jesus Christ came to take away our sins, many scriptures throughout the Bible support this. We can continually admit our wrongs and God gives us grace to outwork the sin habits we have endured since the beginning (Psalm 51:5). We do not want to be seen as frustrating the grace of God (Galatians 2:11-21). God WILL deal with the behaviours and attitudes within us that do not reflect him.

Throughout the history of man, from creation we have turned from God to look another way. Time and time again we read stories seeing God’s love and forgiveness but we never look beyond it. We somehow miss the part where God dealt with mans corrupt nature even though he forgave them.

Genesis 2:15-17 is God’s instruction to Adam to not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Genesis 3 speaks of Adam and Eve disobeying this instruction and sin (doing wrong against God) entering into all humanity. Verses 7-19 speak of the CONSEQUENCES of disobeying what God had said. Verses 21-24 show that God put them out of the original place where he dwelt with them.

God forgave man, he loved man, he was gracious towards man but God still corrected man. God is a just God, a God of order and justice. He disciplines those he loves (Proverbs 3:12).

After Moses led the people out of Egypt, they complained and eventually worshipped a golden calf. Exodus 32 tells of this story and yet again, even after Moses pleaded with God on behalf of the people, God still punished their behaviour (verses 33-35).

I could go back and forth with this from the Bible. Noah and the flood, Jonah and the people of Nineveh, Sodom and Gomorrah; the list is endless. God always sent someone to warn people of what would happen if they did not truly repent when you look through the Old Testament.

Nehemiah 9:28-31 (NLT);

“But as soon as they were at peace, your people again committed evil in your sight, and once more you let their enemies conquer them. Yet whenever your people turned and cried to you again for help, you listened once more from heaven. In your wonderful mercy, you rescued them many times! “You warned them to return to your Law, but they became proud and obstinate and disobeyed your commands. They did not follow your regulations, by which people will find life if only they obey. They stubbornly turned their backs on you and refused to listen. In your love, you were patient with them for many years. You sent your Spirit, who warned them through the prophets. But still they wouldn’t listen! So once again you allowed the peoples of the land to conquer them. 31 But in your great mercy, you did not destroy them completely or abandon them forever. What a gracious and merciful God you are!

God continually forgives and loves man but he never condones sin. He never accepts the wrong behaviour of people. It is not his nature. When people do wrong, he addresses it and then moves on.

My question to you is WHY DO WE CONDONE RATHER THAN CHALLENGE PEOPLE’S WRONG BEHAVIOURS AND ATTITUDES WHEN GOD DOESN’T? Whether you follow Christianity or not, this question can still be asked in society.

Not only did God warn people in the Old Testament about changing, this theme carried through to Jesus in the New Testament.

John 8:1-11 is the story where Jesus saves the prostitute from being stoned. In verse 11 Jesus tells the woman to go but SIN NO MORE. Again just like the Old Testament, he doesn’t condone her actions.

Jesus always corrected people wherever he went. He would teach in the synagogues and throughout the lands whilst also performing miracles. When he did not agree with people’s behaviours he challenged them, in particular the Pharisees. When people’s natures turned the temple into something it was never meant to be, Jesus became angry and yet again did not condone their actions (John 2:13-16).

Again I ask you WHY DO WE CONDONE RATHER THAN CHALLENGE PEOPLE’S WRONG BEHAVIOURS AND ATTITUDES WHEN GOD DOESN’T? Jesus did not condone it either.

Luke 17:1-4 (The Message);

He said to his disciples, “Hard trials and temptations are bound to come, but too bad for whoever brings them on! Better to wear a millstone necklace and take a swim in the deep blue sea than give even one of these dear little ones a hard time! “Be alert. If you see your friend going wrong, correct him. If he responds, forgive him. Even if it’s personal against you and repeated seven times through the day, and seven times he says, ‘I’m sorry, I won’t do it again,’ forgive him.”

 Matthew 7:12 says that we should do things to people what we want done to ourselves. Did you know that you could also frustrate one man’s grace to another?

In order to frustrate a person you must make their plans or efforts to become worthless or of no avail. To disappoint or thwart them. Other words for ‘thwart’ are baffle, confuse, cramp, double cross, obstruct, prevent, restrain, hold up, and upset.

If we can frustrate God’s grace by never truly repenting, letting the Holy Spirit change us then how can we not frustrate man’s grace? We are partakers in God’s grace (Philippians 1:7).

God does not put up with our bad behaviours and attitudes. He says he will hand us over to them if we do not change (Romans 1:28).

So why should we accept it? Why should we use the fruits of the spirit out of context in order to be nice and super-spiritual when the Bible clearly says that we should address it? Paul was one of the people in the New Testament that would write letters to the churches and individuals, not only encouraging them but also correcting them where needed.

We are to have the fruits of the Spirit but still operate in the dimension of love when correcting others or being corrected ourselves (Galatians 6:1). The Holy Spirit helps us by giving us the strength we need. He helps us when we are to make allowances for one another (Colossians 3:13). The Holy Spirit does not condone it. This does not mean we will not grow weary or tired of purposeful or ignorant unchanged behaviours and attitudes within each other.

Jesus tells us to be in the world, not of it (Romans 12:2), we are not like the world because he is not like the world (John 17:16). So why do we allow it?

This does not mean that we go around exploiting, judging and speaking out of term people’s business; there is a time and place for how we are to deal with things (Ecclesiastes 3). We need wisdom (James 1:5) for how to deal with situations, knowing if we are to say something and if so, when and where. Prayer and timing is key. I do not believe that we are supposed to stay silent and accept what God does not accept.

Matthew 18:12-17 & James 5:13-18 gives us tips on how to deal with these situations. It is important that we carry the nature of God inside of us. We forgive but never condone sin habits from an unchanged internal nature.

Lets think about how we respond to one another, in love but also correcting each other to continue in the life God truly has for us.

People who accept discipline are on the pathway to life,
    but those who ignore correction will go astray. (Proverbs 10:17)

Sometimes Only Beauty Can Talk To Your Beast

Disney characters are not my usual choice of subject matter but I must admit that my mind has presently become enchanted by the story of ‘Beauty and the Beast‘.

A witch places a curse upon a handsome Prince turning him into a beast because of the horror of his character. An old man is held captive by the beast due to an accident and his daughter Belle goes on a rescue mission to get her father back but falls into a much bigger adventure; falling in love and releasing the Beast from his curse.

This tale has a happy ending but life does not always grant us such a wish. Although this story is make-believe, it also mirrors human reality.  We are allured into a display of unconditional love. The fierce awakened heart of Belle vs the dead heart of the Beast.

Belle’s beauty not only entices the natural eye but is also within. Beauty is defined in the dictionary as;

The quality present in a thing or person that gives intense pleasure or deep satisfaction to the mind, whether arising from sensory manifestations (as shape, colour, sound, etc.), a meaningful design or pattern, or something else (as a personality in which high spiritual qualities are manifest).

It is a personality and character trait, not just an external mark. Belle’s internal beauty not only accepts but unrestrictedly loves. The bravery of her heart pours out love and life to the Beast who is cold and uninviting in nature.

What I love about both characters other than their vast differences is their need for each other. Life must meet with death.

Life can cause us to become like the Beast; ugly. Part of our nature, our character turns wild in order to cope with how we have handled life. We can become cold on the inside whilst operating as normal in society. Externally we have it all going on but internally we are or have died.

We can bring the term ‘living dead’ to life, physically alive but internally sleeping.  The Beast was as fine as can be. He operated in all his powers and duties as Prince but a part of him was quite dead on the inside.

The thought came to me recently that we all need beauty in our lives. Pure and true love brings forth a deeper beauty that outshines its external counterpart. The kind of love that melts hearts and is not destructive or lustful. Belle’s warm heart and loving nature freed an enslaved Prince from his cruel and selfish nature. We all need a nature in life that causes us to become better.

This can be seen in the relationship of Phoebe and Cole in the TV series Charmed. Cole is a half human/ half demon (Belthazor) sent to kill Phoebe and her sisters who are witches. Cole falls in love with Phoebe and it is this love that not only saves Phoebe and her sisters but also Cole. The beauty of love from Phoebe takes over and helps the beast inside Cole.

 

Again this happens  in the film Dracula: Untold. In order to protect his kingdom Prince Vlad becomes a monster (vampire). When the beast inside of him becomes stronger it is his wife who calms the beast through love by reminding him of who he really is.

These examples show beauty and love through the vessel of a woman but I want us to look beyond gender and see that the real beauty is expressed through their internal nature. This beauty within them and a ‘knowing’ of who they are paves way for unconditional love, continuous persistence and strength to accept those they love. Out of this strength a hope and grace is released which empowers them to walk alongside a beast nature until the original nature comes back.

Sometimes it is hard to talk to a beast but love can break through. On our good and bad days we can all become like the Hulk. Kind words, encouragement, wise counsel and advice; anything that awakens us inside is important. Not a quick fix pill but a character and nature that transforms us into who we really are.

The beast transformed back into the Prince but had changed his nature. Cole eventually lost Phoebe due to his dark side and lived in regret, never losing or forgetting his love for her. A battle caused Prince Vlad to lose his wife and he became a monster for eternity.

We always have a choice in the matter of who we become. We cannot control life circumstances or guarantee our endings but we can choose who we are. We must allow beauty to transform us when presented with it in its true form, accept true love. Finding this is a process but your journey with true beauty and love must begin.

 

 

What Is LIVING In Your Head?

Your mind is a vast specimen and an approved force to be reckoned with however in an unwholesome stage it can be your worst nightmare. Take a few minutes to watch the below clip from the series Criminal Minds (season 10 episode 11– The Forever People).

The above clip is solely my driven purpose for this blog post as I am not here to talk about this episode in its entirety.

Jennifer Jareau, known as JJ suffered traumatic and unforeseen abuse at the hands of her ex- overseas colleague, Tivon Askari, whilst working a case. JJ again became a victim of those which her and the team imprison. She suffered not only mental but also physical torture which triggered the loss of her unborn child; forever leaving her scarred.

After the death of Tivon, one year later she is forced to face the anniversary of the event. Every thought and emotion made its presence known and began to manifest like water given to plants. Just like the rest of humanity JJ is no exception to the constant battle of the mind. Even after one year JJ was under the assumption that she had dealt with the situation, which to us in our terms means “I thought I was over it?”.

For one whole year JJ functioned in her ability as a mum, wife and BAU agent. Mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually she had dealt with very little concerning what had happened. We know this as the above clip speaks of JJ’s unconscious mind.

JJ’s dialogue makes for interesting discussion. Her behaviour started speaking which showed a change in her character. Something has shifted in JJ. Her speech, confidence and actions exhibited her non-verbal dialogue. The real conversation was between JJ and her unconscious mind, that which was internally speaking to her.

Tivon Askari

Your unconscious mind is very much alive. We go through different situations and circumstances of which we most times have no control over. The deciding factor of rising above or sinking beneath are the decisions we internally make which determine our actions. The only problem is that we forget to CHECK our unconscious mind.

By definition alone the word unconscious means without awareness, cognition or sensation. The processes in the mind that take place automatically and not given a reflection period. Our thought processes, memories, motivations, etc. The unconscious and its processes exist under the surface and impact our behaviour. Academic research studies have suggested that the unconscious includes repressed feelings, automatic skills, subliminal perceptions, thoughts, habits, automatic reactions and possibly hidden phobias and desires. Some processes expressed in dreams, slips of the tongue and jokes.

Dealing with that which is under the surface is a very important part of growing as a person. When a part of you is revealed and this is enlightened unto you, you have a responsibility and an accountability to do something about it. However as the unconscious deals with under the surface, it HAS to be revealed. Sometimes people are used to show us what we are really made of then at other times we can see our own reflections based upon how we respond to that which happens to us. Yes there is always help but we also have a part to play. JJ’s response was to function at home and work but what she really needed to do was face the monster in her unconscious mind.

Dr Reid addressing JJ’s behaviour

Rather than looking under our skin we can sometimes become efficient. Using what we have in order to just pass by in life rather than sacrificing ourselves to the fullest in order to be all we can be. We hide in the functioning of everyday life when in reality we are unaware of the damage we are doing to ourselves because we are not dealing with what we are really thinking, feeling and going through which is internally taking its toll. Regardless of how much we divorce ourselves from reality we  will never deal with what is under our surface until we face it for ourselves. We all have our own individual ways of dealing with things but what is really living in our minds? What is your unconscious mind saying to you?

The mental processing taking place in our mind is what needs to be daily re-evaluated and challenged. Whether this be our religious belief systems, our dealings with people, how we talk or act towards ourselves and others, our values, our jobs, our personal confidence and self esteem, our relationships with our neighbours, family and friends; the list goes on. We really need to check all our repressed feelings, automatic skills, subliminal perceptions, thoughts, habits, automatic reactions, hidden phobias and desires. We need to see what is going on inside of us. Even the Bible tells us to examine ourselves (1Corinthians 11:28) and look at yourself to change you before being quick to judge others (Matthew 7:5).

My proposal to you today and even unto myself is for us conduct an individual check-up on ourselves; our hearts, feelings and MIND. Yes there is more to our minds than the unconscious but we need to see what is living in it as it is that which has the potential to make or break us. Whether you turn to people for wise counsel or prayer, something needs to be done with the living elements in our minds. Do not be ignorant, deceived or not willing to deal with yourself.

Let’s find and take this journey. There will be times when we really do not like, want to see or even believe what is really underneath but I can assure you that taking and sticking with the best process is a lifetime commitment and will be beneficial. We are merely responding to what can be a great time of change and transformation.

 

 

Sing For Me…

The Phantom of the opera is there, inside my mind…. sing, sing my angel of music…. arrr——- sing for me… arrr—— sing for me… arrr—— sing for me… arrr—— sing for me.

The above quote are lyrics taken from the spectacular musical performance of Andrew Lloyd Webber‘s ‘Phantom of the Opera‘ at the Royal Albert Hall for the shows 25th anniversary. What captivated me about these words were the separately sung lines “sing for me” by the five phantoms (John Owen Jones, Ramin Karimloo, Anthony Warlow, Colm Wilkinson and Peter Joback).

Each phantom in reality took it in terms to say the line to show the changing faces of the phantoms through the years but let’s put a whole new spin on this… let’s go all mental. In reality there is only one phantom but what this scene shows if we look at it mentally is that there are many voices. Without going too deep just think back to one event, one moment when you have decided to do something or even been in a situation where your mind has come to realms of exploding because there are many different voices speaking.

Arrr—– sing for me… arrr—— sing for me… arrr—— sing for me… arrr—— sing for me.

There is only ONE true voice, only ONE real voice; the others are not.

I recently read Elijah’s story in the Bible when he was threatened by Jezebel and he basically legged it (1Kings 17-19). For those who are or are not familiar with it, in chapter 19 Elijah goes to Mount Sinai and spends the night in a cave. God calls to him asking him what is he doing there and Elijah repeats the same statement summarising he is he only one (a true prophet of God) left and that people are out to kill him like they did the others. So later on in that same chapter there was a major windstorm followed by an earthquake and then a fire. After the fire there was a silent whispher. Does this sound familiar?

You make a decision, there’s soo much drama and thoughts that it is hard to find the right answer. You are planning something and your mind becomes really creative that you have so many thoughts you do not know which idea to use or start with. You read, listen to or watch something and you want to know more but because there are so many different sources and stories you have no idea which one is real or not. Then sometimes you just follow a bubble and believe what you want to believe and pursue it, however it does not always mean it is right.

Arrr—– sing for me… arrr—— sing for me… arrr—— sing for me… arrr—— sing for me.

Just like Christine (the female lead from Phantom of the Opera), you hear many voices that are not real. The “arrr—–” representing you are asking all the questions, finding out things, etc but the “sing for me” representing the many ‘other’ voices you hear allowing you not to be able to hear or think properly, confusion and no mental decision made strong.

A double minded man is unstable in all his ways. James 1:8 (King James version).

Even if you do not follow the Bible, this scripture still stands as truth. Let me out it like this, have you ever asked an indecisive person to make a decision? They can not make a decision as they do not stand strong on any one thing. Have you ever made a decision then heard something else and all of a sudden you become confused? You did not solidly stand on your decision otherwise you would not of become confused. See, the scripture still stands as when you are double minded, you can’t stand as there is no solid decision or action made.

This is what makes Elijah’s story great as he couldn’t stand because the same thing he believed was now tested. Where he once stood strong in being a prophet of the real God and speaking against those who were not had become the man who now is running. However after the winds, earthquakes and fire there was a ‘GENTLE WHISPHER‘. With everything else going on, there was still a moment of truth and peace. It is like when they say the eye of the storm is the calmest part. This is the sound we are looking for, the gentle whispher in sound after the storm- in the stress, in the depression, in the suicidal thoughts, in the lust, in the evil thinking… that gentle whispher which is the RIGHT voice. The voice of reasoning, conviction, right morale and TRUTH.

This is the crazy part, finding the gentle whispher/ eye IN the storm. With everything that is going on around us, all the murders, all the lies, all the depression, etc… we can only look to seek the truth and find those who have REAL truth. Whether you know God or not, seeking real truth will bring a peace to your storm.

³¹ Then said Jesus to those Jews which believed on him, If ye continue in my word, then are ye my disciples indeed;

³² And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free. John 8 (King James version).

The above scripture says Jesus is the truth and his word (the truth) will set you free. I know that many people do not believe in God or Jesus and come from many different belief systems and religions; however I plea you to find real truth in your lives and not to be caught tangled in the ‘other’ voices. Just because you hear a voice it does not mean it is right and you should follow it. This can lead to very damaging consequences in life.