Title Without Character

WHO we are is a powerful statement. How we act, think and feel speak of who we are as a people. They narrate our character.

In life we are on our individual journeys of BECOMING who we are as people. Whether this be spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally, in our careers and jobs, tastes of music, education, etc, we are in a process. Our characters are forming.

We can become in danger of wanting things but not developing the character that will allow us to sustain that which we want. Simba from The Lion King is a great example of this.

Simba was the son of King Mufasa, and was the next rightful heir to the throne.  He was very sure of himself knowing that he was born into royalty, he knew who his father was, and he knew that one day he would be king and rule over the other lions and the lands.

At this point in time Simba was only a child, maturity had not yet kindled itself within him. He acted how he thought.

Simba had what we would call in today’s society, an under-developed character. Due to what he knew, he thought that his present tense character was enough to sustain him as king.

Even though he was destined to be king, he had not yet formed the character necessary to be a good king. He wanted the title but didn’t have the character.

A title is something descriptive or distinctive that belongs to someone. Simba’s title was king, but for us it could be marriage, business, a relationship, car, house, job/ new job, head of a department, career, education, money, etc.

When we put character to title within this context, it changes everything.

Definition of character: The aggregate of features and traits that form the individual nature of some person or thing.

Simba was always destined to be king, that was never going to change. However, he had to go through a process to develop his character.

He had to change his mind so that his true character could be formed. We have to move from a knowing, into being.

The rest of the film shows how Simba’s character changed before he finally became the king he was meant to be.

If he did not go through the necessary process then he never would of developed the character that allowed him to be a good king.

We, as a people, are no different to Simba. No matter who we are or what we do, we MUST develop good character. We must go through training that will shape our characters, so that no matter where we are WE KNOW WHO WE ARE.

We must always be developing our characters. These traits and features we have will then sustain us in what we do. Our values, standards, attitude, and vision cannot be tinted because our character has been forged in the fire.

Character development cannot be cheated. Your external will always show your internal. If good character is not there then it will eventually show.

Having a title or being given a title, in the context stated earlier,  and developing good character alongside it is fine. The problem is being given or wanting titles and not developing good character.

Do not cheat yourself out of the character process. When you go through things, see the process of character through it.

There is no use in having a great future if your character does not match it.

Do not forfeit your character or take on a title with a premature character. We must check ourselves, our characters to see what we are being made of. Development is key.

A Sense of Belonging

Take a minute to watch the below clip.

This was one of KFC’s television adverts in 2015. It was broadcasted, simply illustrating a couple who adopt a child. The boy is shy at first but whilst having a family KFC meal, the father pulls out a chair, inviting the boy to the meal (keep this part in mind for me).

We then see a montage of the boy growing up, and when he is older and goes around to his parents for a KFC meal. He sees another adopted child and pulls out the chair, as his dad did for him.

KFC want to denote that KFC meals bring people together; families together. However my personal meaning signified something else.

What I love about this advert is its pure simplicity in reflecting the principle of ‘belonging.’

As humans, whether we admit it or not, we all want to belong to something. We all long to be part of some story where we can be part of an adventure or an unveiling (as discussed in Stasi and John Eldridge’s book Captivating).

For a person to belong, it means for them ‘to be in the relation of a member, adherent,inhabitant, etc.‘ They are invited and accepted into something that they now become part of. Just like the boy in the KFC, we grow when we KNOW that we are part of something.

Back in 2010, whilst at university one of the conclusions in my dissertation was that young people often join gangs because they are offered a ‘family.’ Take gang affiliation out of the equation, how different is the boy in the KFC advert to this? How different are we?

Feelings are just emotions, they are a part of us. Not always true to their origin or always leading us down the right path, but must be taken into consideration and dealt with.

We find ourselves in two positions:

1. Do we know, and not just feel, that we belong to someone or something?
2. Do we pull out the chair for others?

When people don’t fit a certain criteria or crouch to another persons ways, they are segregated from what they believe they are part of. Society calls them ‘misfits.’

We don’t have the right to exclude others regardless of external or internal states. We were all created with one design but different personalities.

The scary thing about this ‘sense of belonging’ is that if it is not found, it can forfeit a person, turning them into a shadow of who they really are.

Unless you KNOW you are part of something, you will squander your purpose.

Let me explain this by going back to the KFC advert. What would of happened if the dad never pulled out the chair for the boy? The answer is simple… everything we saw in the montage afterwards would never have taken place.

As the boy was adopted, those who he was staying with were not his biological parents. Knowing this, the boy did not know how to respond as he came from a different background.

When we become unsure about someone or something, even in the slightest, we internally and externally move.

By simply pulling out the chair, the boy was invited to their home. He was invited to be their son and part of the family. This caused the boy to catapult, later seeing him graduate and have a family of his own.

At some point in life, we must all belong to something. This sense of belonging pushes past being a mere emotion, but forms a strong belief on the inside of a person.

Sometimes we make good choices, sometimes we make bad choices, or sometimes life makes choices for us.

Hopefully we won’t become a people who stop or hinder others; even ourselves, from belonging to something.

We may not be the same or sometimes have a lot in common, but when people are part of the same clan with the same vision, there is no question that destiny will connect them and give them this sense of belonging.

Once they know who they are and where they belong, just like the boy in the KFC advert, they will grow and unveil into a mighty person. The person they were created to be.

A Present Problem

As a people we have both healthy and unhealthy obsessions with our past and our future.

Our past speaks of situations and circumstances that we have been through and may still keep or have kept us captive for a long time. They have hit our physical, emotional and spiritual states, being reason for why they are impacting. Our past forms of things which have or we have allowed to hit the very core of who we are, being reason to why we find it hard to let go of certain things and allow ourselves to become or stay chained to what has happened and what once was.

The future on the other hand can be similar but contrary. Rather than being chained to what happened, we are chained to what can be. Our future speaks of the unknown, a scary place for the human species. We obsess and have cautious anxieties and deep fears over who we will become, what we will do and how we will be and live. These fears and anxieties can often cause us to resist or relapse on what we can be in life and what we can do.

The only problem with this double sided coin of past and future is that it misses one key element, the present. We always speak about our past, how we should let things go and not become a slave to our past. Also the future in terms of striving to be your best so your future can be bright and successful. Of course, there is nothing wrong with this but we never seem to concern ourselves with our present, the ‘now.’

We believe that our past and future hold the key to our lives but I believe that it is your present that holds the key to your life. This thought has been running through my mind since the start of the new year. Our past and future can hinder us but our present can stop us.

What exactly do I mean by this? Let me put things into a different perspective. We live in the present, surviving our past regardless of what we have been through and where we have come from, and making way for walking into our future. However your present is the now you that is living. Your mental, emotional, physical and spiritual state are what cause you to stay locked in your past or dead to your future. A glimpse of our future gives us hope and the letting go of our past allows us to become free, but our present must ‘see’ and ‘walk’ this out in the now.

No matter what happened in your past or how prospering your future is, if your present self is not mentally, physically, spiritually or emotionally right, making the right decisions or walking in the right direction, it can and will abort who you really are and all you will become. What you submit yourself to you will become. This is why our present and now self must be in a constant state of renewal, healing and rebuilding, otherwise it will stop us from breaking away from our past and put glass in front of our future, only allowing us to see what could of been.

Let’s get our minds and hearts right from 2016 onwards. Let us find ourselves in these constant states of renewal, healing and rebuilding. Our present self must be free and making the right decisions that enable us to be free from our past and able to achieve and bring life to our future. Even as we have entered into this new year with new hopes, desires and goals to accomplish, let us also think about what our present state is allowing us to become.

An Untouchable Nature

‘The Untouchables‘ is a four time nominated Academy Award film from 1987 based upon the autobiography memoirs of Eliot Ness, published in 1957 about the capture of crime boss Al Capone.

In the film, government agent Eliot Ness (actor Kevin Costner) alongside a hand selected team including officer Jimmy Malone (actor Sean Connery), later to be called ‘The Untouchables‘, set out to stop gangster leader Al Capone (actor Robert De Niro) because of his seven year reign of corruption during the prohibition.

In the film Al Capone is seen as invincible. Through the power of persuasion and influence, any crime that could be connected to him quickly dissolved. He had informants and inside men in different fields of work that allowed him to become like the federal agent group after him, untouchable. 

Robert De Niro as Al Capone

Even though the film title refers to the group of law enforcement agents, the thing that strikes me is the untouchability of Al Capone. Untouchable means that the nature of something cannot be touched, it cannot be moved. Al Capone had this nature.

Do you know that men (universally speaking) can have untouchable natures? The very essence of who they are cannot be touched. For a person to be untouchable it means that an area of their life, mind, emotions, will and hearts cannot be penetrated.

Exodus 32:9 I have seen these people,” the LORD said to Moses, “and they are a stiff-necked people.” (NIV)

Acts 7:51 “You stiff-necked people! Your hearts and ears are still uncircumcised. You are just like your ancestors: You always resist the Holy Spirit! (NIV)

The Bible, in the Old Testament (days before Christ, Jewish history) God and those he spoke through always talked about proud people and the turning away of God. It was also spoken of in the New Testament (days of and after Christ, birth of the church, etc). To be stiff-necked is to be proud.

Are you untouchable like this? Is there a part of you that cannot be moved?

• Can people speak to you about issues in your life without you taking offence?
• Are you a know-it-all or can you listen to what others say without shutting them or yourself down?
• Are you in a delusion of humility but really oozing of pride?
• Are you open to be wrong about something or someone?

We can ask ourselves many rhetorically questions to find out whether or not we have an untouchable nature within ourselves and lives. Natures can be formed and re-formed.

In my last blog post I wrote about your character speaking for you. What you choose to do in action will speak before you in words. The nature of a person is very important, your lifestyle and character show people who you are.

Al Capone’s lifestyle was an example of this, he allowed crime, violence and corruption to form his untouchable nature.

Not all is lost in this nature as it can take on two forms, good or bad, proud or humble. Humility is having the quality or condition of a modest opinion or a knowing of one’s own importance, rank, etc. Even Jesus knew he was more than that which he chose to take on (Philippians 2). Al Calpone represents the negative but Paul from the Bible is an example of an untouchable nature in the positive.

Saul of Tarsus (his name before his encounter with God) persecuted followers of Christ until  his encounter with God on the Damascus road, which completely changed Paul’s nature (his name after his encounter of the risen Christ).

In the Bible, Paul in the New Testament records;

And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord (Romans 8:38-39– NLT).

After Paul was changed from his encounter, he became untouchable in the things of God, speaking up for what he believed in and sharing it with people, even when it put him in prison. He still had his issues, like we all do, but he chose to become moved by God only.

We have the choice of which side of untouchability we become.   We become incorruptible and unmoved in good or we become corruptible and unmoved in wrong.

Never under-estimate the power of an untouchable nature. Look within yourself to see what type of untouchable you are.

Your Character Speaks For You

“Features and traits that form the individual nature of a person or thing.”

The above is a definition of the word ‘character’. Whether we like it or not, or whether it is noticed or not, our character speaks for us.

Matthew 15:11 It is not what goes into the mouth that makes a person unclean. It is what comes out of the mouth that makes a person unclean. (International Standard Version)

From the above scripture we can see the principle of character relating to the inner state of a person, not only speech. It speaks of what we are made of, what is on the inside of us.

Character is quality, the essence of who we are. When I refer to the term ‘speak’, I do not mean this in the form of audible speech (which it can mean) but I am referring to the manifested fruit of ones actions and behaviours. Our speech of course is important as we do need to think about what we say, how we say it (related scriptures on our speech), but my concern in this post is our actions and behaviours.

Actions speak louder than words

Matthew 7:16 You can identify them by their fruit, that is, by the way they act. Can you pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? (New Living Translation)

Life impacts everyone differently. Situations bring out both the best and worst of us. However the underlying factor that separates individuals characters is what a person allows to be formed within them. It is this forming of traits and features that is important and should be reflected upon.

Like the farmer who sows seeds in soil for need of a good harvest, we must check what the seeds (features and traits) are before sowing them (allowing them to become part of us) as well as the soil (our hearts, minds, bodies, etc) that they are becoming part of.

What traits and features are you becoming? What have you become already? These could be jealousy, envy, hate, love, compassion, musical taste, rejection, religious beliefs, values, addictions, drugs, alcohol, smoking, laziness, political views, cultural traditions, etc; there are many of which are unlisted here. Traits and features are what make you YOU. These questions must be asked to yourself.

I once heard someone say that whether we grow or not, we are becoming something. That God is interested in what we are becoming. I am pretty sure this was Stasi Eldredge but cannot be 100%.

Speech alone is not enough to carry you through life.  Actions and speech walk hand in hand, hence the saying “you can talk the talk but can you walk the walk?”

We must accustom our speech AND behaviours. Speech can go before us but most times behaviour does because of what we think or how we feel and act. At times we do not need to say anything for something or someone to experience something from us. This can be seen also in first impressions. Hypocrisy has been a well known giant in society.

John Maxwell in his book, The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership, speaks about The Law of the Lid (an individual’s effectiveness has a say on their leadership and potential). We cannot talk something that we do not walk.

If what we say has truly become us then it will be manifested, good or bad. We must change speech but also our actions & behaviours.

I have this one question for you, WHAT IS YOUR CHARACTER SAYING ABOUT YOU?

Reflect upon the quality of your character, both internally and externally. John 1:14 states that the Word (Jesus) became flesh (human). What type of flesh (quality in this regards) has your character become or is becoming? What’s the production of your character?

We seek only to be the best we can be but at what cost?

Mark 8:36 What good does it do for people to win the whole world yet lose their lives? (God’s Word Translation)

The Sowers Seed

“Listen! A farmer went out to plant some seeds. As he scattered them across his field, some seeds fell on a footpath, and the birds came and ate them. Other seeds fell on shallow soil with underlying rock. The seeds sprouted quickly because the soil was shallow.  But the plants soon wilted under the hot sun, and since they didn’t have deep roots, they died.  Other seeds fell among thorns that grew up and choked out the tender plants.  Still other seeds fell on fertile soil, and they produced a crop that was thirty, sixty, and even a hundred times as much as had been planted!  Anyone with ears to hear should listen and understand.” Matthew 13: 3-9 (NLT)

This story speaks of a farmer who plants seeds. It is illustrated to us that there are different types of soil which either promote or demote the growth of the seed once planted.

I wish not to talk about the soil but the seed itself, about man-made seeds. To understand the scope of my thoughts you must first understand what I mean by seeds. The dictionary defines seed as ‘any propagative part of a plant, including tubers, bulbs, etc., especially as preserved for growing a new crop.’ In less scientific speech, the part of a plant that creates reproduction, growth. It reproduces its own kind.

A farmer must know what seed to plant and how to look after it. Putting this into a spiritual, emotional and mental context; we are farmers too. We are farmers in two perspectives;

1. We must know what seeds are or are being planted within us.
2. We must be aware of what seeds we plant within others.

What seeds are inside of us? Doubt, fear, wrath, pain, unforgiveness, bitterness, strength, jealousy, love, hope, strife, dishonesty, loyalty, laziness, joy, lust, etc., the list goes on. There are many different seeds, we are responsible for the seeds that we allow to grow inside of us and their fruit (behaviours, attitudes, etc). These seeds are not originally created by man but they become man made seeds when planted as we have the choice to allow them to grow or uproot them.

Life has a way of producing certain seeds within us through how we respond to our situations and circumstances; however what about seeds we plant in others?

A less attractive but polished way to show this is through the film Alien Resurrection. Alien eggs have been planted inside human beings. Hating to state the obvious, aliens and humans are different species so we know that when the alien hatches that it is not going to be a pretty sight for the human. Likewise, this is also the case in less graphics with when we plant corruptible seeds in others. Just like the alien broke out, so do the wrong seeds when planted in others. The person will take on the nature of that which was planted.

Another visual of this is through Prue from the TV series Charmed. In series 3 episode 6, Prue comes across an innocent who is cursed with feeling all the pain of the world. The innocent is really a demon but Prue being unaware of his true identity helps him. Her spell backfires and she ends up with what he was cursed with. As this was not Prue’s portion, she began to fall because of that which she had taken upon herself.

Prue unable to contain the corruptible seed within

Alien Resurrection and Charmed let us know that there are two different routes in which man made seeds are planted. Alien Resurrection shows that others plant wrong seeds and Charmed shows that through lack of discernment we can take on the wrong seeds, another’s battle that is not ours.

Once a seed has been planted it goes through a process of growth. Either way, corruptible man made seeds bring death.

What goes into someone’s mouth does not defile them, but what comes out of their mouth, that is what defiles them.” Matthew 15:11 (NIV)

That which is on the inside will eventually manifest on the outside. We must take a long look at ourselves, externally and internally, to see what seeds are inside us. Character and speech will tell us what is on the inside.

Seeds because of their reproductive nature will affect others, whether good or bad. Let us check ourselves today and seek help and change for making sure we do not find ourselves reproducing bad seeds or even taking on bad seeds ourselves.