Have you died in your past?

I’ve become lost in my films again people! This time it’s Me Before You (stunning book and screenplay written by Jojo Moyes and film directed by Thea Sharrock). Such a beautiful, realism romance story – a real tear-jerker. I really wish I could get lost in this element… can you feel the “but” coming? BUT, I actually learned something quite interesting in such a short space of time. Whether I have fully accepted and processed it is another story, but I want to share the thought with you. I ask you this simple question;

Come and take a walk with me…

The above question was internally posed to me when I had suddenly become drawn to a specific scene of the film. Towards the end, whilst on the beach at night, Louise pours her heart out about how she feels and what the future can hold for herself and William.

Louise sharing her heart with Will

 

 

“Listen, I know this is not how you would have chosen it, but I can make you happy.” – Louise 

 

 

Lou was so happy because she thought she changed Will’s decision to live. It was in this moment when the question began to knock hard on the door of my heart. Will said;

Will telling Louise “no.”

 

“No, no Clark. I get that this could be a good life, but it’s not my life. It’s not even close. You never saw me before. I loved my life. I really loved it…” – Will

 

 

 

No matter how much life had changed for Will; for the better in the last six months, he still wanted to end his life. I want us to remove Will’s story and replace it with our own, our own life. Again, I ask you; “Have you died in your past?”

Will could not face the fact that his life had changed because he died in his old life. After his accident, Will became a different person due to circumstances. He missed the life he used to live and who he used to be in that life. I know I’m not the only person in the world to think “gosh, I miss my past.” We all have our “I miss…” moments. Times when we think about something from our past: a trip or holiday, friends and family where relationships have changed, jobs or career choices, when we made a stupid decision, when we danced or sung, when we had a favourite film or television programme, when we cried in the bathroom, when we got drunk or smoked, when we went clubbing; etc. We’re only human, we miss things from time-to-time, it’s normal. Missing a part of our past is not a problem, but if you have died in that past moment, there is a problem as your present is infected and your future is being affected.

I want you to understand that there is a difference between dying in your past and dying to your past.

1. Dying in your past is when a situation or circumstance has affected you so much that you cannot let go and you died with it. When something similar presents itself, you react the same as you did before or become numb because you never really dealt with it. It means you died in the past and are not; or struggling, to live in the present. You haven’t let go.
2. Dying to your past is accepting that a situation or circumstance changed you, but when it presents itself in the present, you respond differently because you accepted and began, or did deal with it. It means you are or have moved on.

For Will, it was a motorbike accident leaving him disabled from the neck down with other health problems, that caused him to not see a better future outside of his past. He just couldn’t see anymore, no matter how good his present had become and great his future really was. I ask you another question; “What was your accident?”

What crippled you? (metaphorically speaking). What is it that has left you dying? What was the situation, circumstance or person that left you dead? What past moment can you not see beyond? This could be mentally, spiritually, physically or emotionally. We are all individuals and our accidents will be different to each of us. Rhetorical questions are always the most uncomfortable because if you let yourself speak to yourself, you find out what is really inside of you, what you really believe and think.

Thinking of your own story, do not be afraid to find life again in your present. Your future can be great if you will die to your past and not die in your past. Miss the memories and don’t die in them. If you have, I’m here to let you know that there is a different way. You can live again! It might be hard but there is always hope. Ask yourself the rhetorical questions above and ultimately answer the title of this blog post. Find good, wise counsel in people. Seek good advice and find life again. Take baby steps that build heart again, encourage you to see and live again. IT IS POSSIBLE!

I’ll let you in on a little secret. Even though Will chose not to live, in the last six months of his life he actually lived in the present moment. He changed Lou’s future even though he couldn’t change his own. The film shows that you can live if you will just go through the process of being changed, coming out of your past and seeing life; not death, in your future NO MATTER what the circumstances or situations.

Be free from your past, awake in your present and alive for your future. 

 

 

 

Living Out of the Past

For quite a while now I have had this image of a large, square shaped, medium-brown shaded suitcase on a bed. Inside the suitcase are neatly folded clothes which are being taken out by someone. What came to me with this image were the words, ‘living out of the past’.

The clothes in the suitcase simply represented our issues, situations, and circumstances from the past, the suitcase represented our future, and the process of closing the case and carrying it to our destination represented our present.

With this image in mind, I simply have one question for you: What are you carrying in your present from your past that you shouldn’t be?

Sometimes our past (gone by, elapsed in time, having existed in or having occurred during a time previous to the present,) can hinder (to cause delay, interruption, difficulty in) our future. It is important that we go back and deal with our past, and deal with it well, as we cannot afford to take it into our future.

In order to deal with your past you have to understand and know what exactly you are doing. You have to be able to see it and accept it for what it is. Don’t hide from it, but face it. For Christians, this is walking with the Holy Spirit (Spirit of God) and asking Him to help you deal with your past; He is your helper (John 16:7, John 14:26). Otherwise, you might seek out wise counsel; the right counsel, and speak to those who can truly help and show you the right way. Those that can point you in the right direction. The past isn’t something you just hack into with no wisdom. You must be wise and strong.

Professor X helped Wolverine deal with his past

However, what stood out to me the most about the suitcase was the neatly folded clothes. Sometimes our past; our experiences, can be so damaging that rather than dealing with them, we neatly box them (hold onto them and everything associated with them) and carry them in our present; ultimately into our futures. We choose to keep the baggage rather than let it go.

Can you image what it is like to put these clothes (our past) back on?

Can you imagine wearing your past constantly?

What does this look like for you?

We choose to love the pain rather than drain it from our systems. Sometimes it is easier to live with it than deal with it, BUT this isn’t the way forward to living in life. Holding onto the past can be very dangerous. Over a large life-span, rather than living for the future, you are dying for the past.

Make the decision to deal with your past today. Whether it be journalling your emotions, praying, seeking wise counsel from another; begin the process. As hard as it can be, don’t die to your future because of your past. Find the courage to look back and NEVER stay there. Learn from it; never continually grieve (distress mentally, sorrow) in it. Don’t put your past back on.

Understanding Magneto

Magneto is one of the most iconic characters in the Marvel franchise. A powerful mutant known for his ability to generate and control magnetic fields, and his firm beliefs and somewhat ‘unorthodox’ methods in enforcing that mutants are evolutionarily superior to humans.

The way in which Magneto handles things have caused us to categorise him as a villain. Can I be bold enough to say that I DO NOT believe Magneto is a villain?

Have we fell into the good vs evil emotional trap in the superhero world again? However wrong his actions may be, Marvel and the film industry have caused me to understand Magneto.

In 2008, Marvel mastermind and creator Stan Lee was interviewed and said he “did not think of Magneto as a bad guy. He just wanted to strike back at the people who were so bigoted and racist… he was trying to defend the mutants, and because society was not treating them fairly he was going to teach society a lesson. He was a danger of course… but I never thought of him as a villain.”

Our perspective of seeing Magneto as a villain is now being challenged. He was never created to be one. So why is he known as a villain?

Just from the above interview segment from Stan Lee alone, we see that we have judged, misunderstood and therefore misinterpreted Magneto. We have viewed an opinion of him based upon his external actions and missed his history and its impact on his heart and person.

Well let me tell you HIS-STORY…

Originally named Max Eisenhardt and born into a German-Jewish family in the late 1920’s. His family survived the Nazi rise to power, the passing of the Nuremberg Laws, and the Kristallnacht. They fled to Poland where captured during the German invasion of Poland, and sent to Warsaw Ghetto. They escaped but were betrayed and re-captured.

His family were executed and buried in a mass grave; only he survived. He escaped but was re-captured and sent to Auschwitz. He was reunited with Magda, who he fell in love with when he was younger and had escaped the prison camp revolt with. They married and settled in Vinnytsia, a west central city in Ukraine, with their daughter Anya. He adopted the name  “Magnus”.

Not really much of a villain thus far is he? A man constantly enslaved, saw his family slaughtered, and constantly on the run from people trying to kill him. Used and abused for his gifts at a young age.

Still believe he is a villain?

In Criminal Minds season 3 episode 10, BAU agent Rossi said, “life is a hell of a thing to happen to a person.” Situations had already began shaping Magneto but the next part of his story is where we see the unfolding and shaping of WHO he has now become.

The three of them lived happy until an angry mob, previously exposed to Magneto’s powers, burned down their home. Anya was still trapped inside, unable to be rescued due to the angry mob. Enraged, Magneto unleashed his powers and in the process killed the mob and destroyed a part of the city.

Magda; scared of his powers, left him and later gave birth to the mutant twins Pietro (Quicksilver) and Wanda (Scarlet Witch) before being presumed dead. Whilst on the run from the authorities and searching for Magda, Magneto took on the identity of Erik Lehnsherr and relocated to Israel. It was here that he met Charles Xavier whilst working at a psychiatric hospital near Haifa.

He lost everything… his heart failed. His entire soul (mind, will and emotions) was torn.

Is Magneto a villain to you now? We are so quick to judge him based upon his actions in how he responds to things, but never look at the reasons WHY. We do this also to people in the real world. Quick to judge their response but do not always attempt to understand or truly see them.

We can also be like Magneto sometimes. People and situations in our lives cause us to react in different ways. According to the history of Magneto, one could say he is accountable or only truly guilty of;

1. Responding inaccurately.
2. Letting people and situations infect him and make him worse.
3. Un-forgiveness and vengeance.
4. Stubbornness
5.  Pride

This is because of never dealing with, and truly getting over the scars of his past. If anything, Magneto is a wounded, hurting man. How different are we at times?

Professor Charles Xavier was the opposite, he had his own mutant struggles and a much more healthier upbringing. He and Magneto debated the consequences humanity faced with the rise of mutants. Charles believed that humans did not understand mutants and that mutants must show humans a different way. Magneto disagreed because of everything humans had cost him.

Charles had the ability to see Magneto, to understand him.

He was one of very few people who understood and believed that with a little help, Magneto could change. That Magneto could use his past to better his future. The fullness of his powers came from his pain and re-focussing it.

Charles saw Magneto for who he was; faults and all. He acknowledged and accepted both the good and bad inside of Magneto. He did not deny any part of Magneto as a person.

It was because of his ability to do this that he could reach Magneto. He allowed Magneto to see something different, being reason for Magneto’s battles between being a villain, anti hero and superhero. He occasionally was an ally and member of the X-Men at times also.

Xavier knew how to walk with people, he did this with Magneto. Not just in word but in action. Regardless of who Magneto chose to be, he still tried to reach Magneto with an open heart and mind believing Magneto could change.

Even though Magneto chooses to not forgive humans, Xavier chooses to keep trying to help him see a different way; a better way. He wants to change his perspective; his heart. He can only do this through understanding and accepting Magneto for all he is.

However, Charles knows that he himself must still battle against Magneto otherwise there would be no humans left. It is great expecting change but you must not diverse from your own personal walk, path and purpose. Charles still had to correct and challenge Magneto on what he was doing in the present, even though he believed he could change. He saw Magneto’s future but also acknowledged the corruption of Magneto’s present because of his unwillingness and hardships in letting go and forgiving his past.

We need to look beyond the external actions of people and see the heart; see inside them. This does not mean we accept and agree with their responses all the time but we understand what has happened on the inside of them, and are willing to walk them through or with them through the scars. We still need to correct and possibly even rebuke; but still love. Showing them grace until healing and deliverance (freedom) from their wounds come.

Magneto does not need to prove that mutants are better than humans, he does not need to try and turn humans into mutants, he does not need to destroy humans… I don’t agree with his actions in the slightest but I understand why he does what he does. He is accountable for whom he chooses to be.

Hearts must be taken into consideration because if they’re not, you’ll lose that person. We do not justify or highlight what they do, but we must see and acknowledge what is happening on their inside rather than judging from external actions.

 

 

 

A Present Problem

As a people we have both healthy and unhealthy obsessions with our past and our future.

Our past speaks of situations and circumstances that we have been through and may still keep or have kept us captive for a long time. They have hit our physical, emotional and spiritual states, being reason for why they are impacting. Our past forms of things which have or we have allowed to hit the very core of who we are, being reason to why we find it hard to let go of certain things and allow ourselves to become or stay chained to what has happened and what once was.

The future on the other hand can be similar but contrary. Rather than being chained to what happened, we are chained to what can be. Our future speaks of the unknown, a scary place for the human species. We obsess and have cautious anxieties and deep fears over who we will become, what we will do and how we will be and live. These fears and anxieties can often cause us to resist or relapse on what we can be in life and what we can do.

The only problem with this double sided coin of past and future is that it misses one key element, the present. We always speak about our past, how we should let things go and not become a slave to our past. Also the future in terms of striving to be your best so your future can be bright and successful. Of course, there is nothing wrong with this but we never seem to concern ourselves with our present, the ‘now.’

We believe that our past and future hold the key to our lives but I believe that it is your present that holds the key to your life. This thought has been running through my mind since the start of the new year. Our past and future can hinder us but our present can stop us.

What exactly do I mean by this? Let me put things into a different perspective. We live in the present, surviving our past regardless of what we have been through and where we have come from, and making way for walking into our future. However your present is the now you that is living. Your mental, emotional, physical and spiritual state are what cause you to stay locked in your past or dead to your future. A glimpse of our future gives us hope and the letting go of our past allows us to become free, but our present must ‘see’ and ‘walk’ this out in the now.

No matter what happened in your past or how prospering your future is, if your present self is not mentally, physically, spiritually or emotionally right, making the right decisions or walking in the right direction, it can and will abort who you really are and all you will become. What you submit yourself to you will become. This is why our present and now self must be in a constant state of renewal, healing and rebuilding, otherwise it will stop us from breaking away from our past and put glass in front of our future, only allowing us to see what could of been.

Let’s get our minds and hearts right from 2016 onwards. Let us find ourselves in these constant states of renewal, healing and rebuilding. Our present self must be free and making the right decisions that enable us to be free from our past and able to achieve and bring life to our future. Even as we have entered into this new year with new hopes, desires and goals to accomplish, let us also think about what our present state is allowing us to become.